Visited Mom Today

What if you could still have meaningful connections with your loved ones-even after an Alzheimer's diagnosis?

Alzheimer's and dementia are notorious for stealing the memories and words from our loved ones. Author John Scully and his family made the difficult decision to place his mother in a nursing home three years after her Alzheimer's diagnosis. He saw first-hand the agitation, the discomfort, and the loneliness the residents experience as they drift in and out of the world we know, to one we-and they-cannot fully understand.

In Visited Mom Today, Scully shares the secret to connecting with those suffering from this confusing, frustrating disease. Scully observed how staff interacted with the residents, who suffered from dementia in varying degrees, and discovered that the connection lies in stepping into their world, instead of reminding them what is no longer possible in this one.

Scully's conversations with dozens of residents will have you laughing out loud, tearing up, and reflecting on your own life experiences. Most of all, Visited Mom Today shows you that personalities and memories made in our core beings cannot be fully erased by the fierceness of dementia.

He recounts one conversation with 80-something-year-old "Kimberly," who was planning a road trip to Florida for her and Scully's mom. Rather than discourage her, he engaged with her, asking questions, and joining in her excitement over the anticipation of the trip. Soon thereafter, Florida was forgotten and Kimberly was on to a new topic, "But today ... for just a few minutes... it sure felt possible."

And that is what Visited Mom Today provides-that feeling of possibility. The memories of what was once possible come alive through these conversations with the residents who could be any one of our family members. While they may not remember names or ages or professions of family members, or where they are, this book demonstrates how the act of meeting someone where they are and engaging with them in that moment, can, however briefly, bring light to the shadows of dementia.